I am not meant to be a teacher/professor, why can't my PI/Advisor get that through his thick balding head. A few weeks ago when I went to discuss setting a date for (what I'm praying will be my final thesis committee meeting) he asked me what I wanted to do when I got my degree. I said the first thing that came to my mind, I wasn't thinking about this at that moment and he'd never asked me this before so I was caught off guard. At the end of our conversation he said I think you'd make a good teacher, I said "I don't think so because I know that's something I won't be good at. Explaining something to someone is one thing but teaching someone is a huge responsibility and I know I won't be able to do that." Then he says "Well I think you would" and I replied I don't really think so.

A little background about why he may think so, this past year I mentored a student from an inner city high school and she did very well. She would come to lab a few times a week and I would 'teach her biology' as the experiments were progressing. People commented that the project was extremely difficult for an high school student, especially one from this school but I didn't think so. Anyway in the end she did very well and even wants to go to college, she won 1st place in the Biology division and was the overall winner at a state science and engineering fair, which allowed her to go on to the Intel International Science and Engineering Fair that was held in Reno,NV a week or so ago. She then went to another conference in another state and placed third over all and our institution hosted a symposium and she also won for best oral presentation. I AM EXTREMELY PROUD OF HER but that DOES NOT mean teaching is my calling. I don't feel comfortable doing it or want to do it. Although I must admit he was really surprised that I was able to do this (which he mentioned to me a couple of times) and at just how well she did.

Then rolls around this week, my PI took in a new Master's degree student he did not ask me to 'teach' this guy anything. He asked me to think about having this guy help me with my project so that in turn he can learn stuff. I said "No, because I'm preparing for my thesis meeting and it now crunch time, and this project is at the point where we are about to really get stuff done." then he proceeded to bring up stuff from years ago which had no relevance at all etc. and guilt me into doing this. I told him no, I hate whenever I don't share his opinion or disagree with him he tries to make me feel guilty and worthless. I think it's definitetly time for me to leave this lab, I can't take this passive agressive behaviour anymore. I want move on to something that has rules and boundries for it's employees, I don't think the lab environment in academia is for me. I'm not his child therefore I don't have to do what he tells me to do, I can think and make decisions on my own.
I'm in lab now working on thesis stuff helping friends prepare for their up coming orals exams.